Winter in the North East © by Tony Fallon.1917

Winter in the North East © by Tony Fallon.1917


I think I must be growing older
Every morning it feels much colder
It’s definitely colder than last year
Maybe not there but certainly here
My fingers are numb also my toes
So are my ears and my nose.
Next week we are promised a foot of snow
The sun is shining and it’s four below
The grandkids are happy they will be skiing
This is not normal weather for a human being
You have to have snow tires on your car
If you are going shopping or to an Irish bar
It doesn’t matter if you are poor or rich
If you hit black ice you wind up in a ditch
And you always have to be on the lookout for deer
There are plenty of them around this time of year
I hate living where everybody is whining
I want to be in a place where the sun is shining
This is not the life I should be living
Next year I’ll be in Florida by Thanksgiving

Oh God © Tony Fallon 010718

Oh God © Tony Fallon 010718


On Face book was a comment by a girl who must be tripping
Anyone who ever criticized our President she was really ripping
She was comparing our President to Jesus Christ our Savior
People are easily led if they fall for his weird kind of behavior
She said that just like Jesus he was being mocked and crucified
I think the major difference is that Jesus never once lied
According to this woman Trump will someday be canonized
I really think this lady needs to go and have her head analyzed
They say you never should discuss sex politics or religion
This girl can’t be serious maybe she’s joking just a smidgen
#7 Jan 07

My wildest Dreams© Tony Fallon1818

My wildest Dreams© Tony Fallon1818

I think of you every moment I’m awake
My friends say falling for you was a mistake
But when we were together I had more fun
Than I ever had with any other, one on one
My bedroom is my comfort zone
Where I only dream of you when I’m alone
When I think of you daily I feel denied
But in my dreams you are always by my side
You haven’t changed you are still the charmer
And I am your knight in shining armor
You are my Lady I am the landed Lord
And I protect us both with my trusted sword
Whenever a dragon should approach
We drive away in a horse and coach
Romantic dreams with a big strong horse
Are the kind of dreams you would endorse
Other nights you’re Marion and I am Robin Hood
And we romp amongst the trees of Sherwood
Other nights we are in a castle in County Tyrone
The drawbridge is up so we are all alone
There would be alligators in the moat
Strong enough to upturn an invading boat
Since we are together are my dreams a prediction
Or are my wildest dreams merely fiction
My dreams are certainly not gaining any ground
Because when I wake up you are still not around.

The day after Thanksgiving© Tony Fallon.112516.

The day after  Thanksgiving© Tony Fallon.112516.

Like this before I’ve never felt

I’ve open my shirt I’ve opened my belt

I’m huffing and puffing

Because, I ate too much stuffing.

I really made a pig of myself

On the television I see the first elf.

Telling us all to be good because

If we aren’t there will be no Santa Clause

I do not worry I do not care

Santa doesn’t come to people with long hair

It also doesn’t help if you are jolly and fat

Better to have a stomach which is flat

If you have a beard and are over zealous

Santa Clause may be a little jealous

So at the North Pole no gift will they wrap

And my address will be crossed off the map.

So at Christmas if you want to win

Try not to look like Santa’s twin.

What if? © Tony Fallon 2/18/2017.

What if? © Tony Fallon 2/18/2017.


What would life be like without you I have often surmised?
I think I’d be very lonely and I’d have teardrops in my eyes
Around the house I am totally useless I have no womanly skills
I’m only good as spending money I never learned to pay the bills
I can hardly make my breakfast I don’t know how salad is tossed
I don’t know about washing cycles I don’t know how to defrost
The thought of using the propane dryer is really horrifying
I’d probably burn the house down while my clothes were drying
I’d never find clean underwear or socks in closet or drawer
And I doubt very much I’d ever dream of sweeping the floor
The dishwasher would be overflowing with mugs and cups and pans
And there would be garbage in bags in the driveway right beside the cans
I wouldn’t know the proper way to thinly slice up a tomato
And I bet I’d slice a finger or two if I tried to peel a raw potato
I’m sure I’d consider it a home cooked meal if I had chicken pot pies
A day out would be topped off with a plate of Mc Donald’s salty fries
The microwave would be my salvation on days when I would be in haste
But who could I complain to when the TV remote is misplaced
I don’t know how to mop, I don’t know how to chop I don’t know how to shop
At the meat counter, I couldn’t pick out a decent steak or a decent pork chop
Remember the morning I tried to make breakfast and the pan was ablaze
And we had the smell of burnt bacon around the place for days
The only thing I could probably do properly is a couple of slices of toast
But I certainly would never try my hand at even a little pot roast
I wouldn’t know about computers at that I surely would fail
It would be useless sending me a message if it was sent by email
So if people want to get in touch with me they better send a letter
But if they called me on the house phone that would probably be better
When I look back over years I realize I’ve led a rather sheltered life
You did all the real dirty work and you were a really wonderful wife
And of course since I retired I’ve lots of advice and always under your feet
Another woman with less patience would have thrown me out on the street.
I can well understand why you have all those pre-planned daily routines
I wonder how they did it years ago before we invented machines

Complicated © Tony Fallon 1/.18/2017

Complicated © Tony Fallon 1/.18/2017

The first day I met you I was elated

With you I was totally infatuated

Maybe even captivated

You sounded like you were so educated

A woman of the world and liberated

Your were the kind of person I had never dated

You were the kind of person for whom I had waited

I knew a friendship had to be cultivated

Because of all the smart people with which you were affiliated

You would never be intimidated

Or manipulated

By people who were intoxicated

I asked if you were single and you stated

You were in a relationship that was complicated

I wondered how this word could be translated

I felt like a bomb in my brain just detonated

And my blood pressure was suddenly elevated

My ego was now definitely deflated

All my hopes and dreams had evaporated

And I also was a little bit humiliated

Because this was not the answer I had anticipated

I asked if that meant you were impregnated

And that every morning you would be nauseated

You said my worry was slightly exaggerated

You said your husband was old and outdated

No way modern at all even antiquated

You said you had two single beds that were separated

And for years now things had not been consummated

There was no chance your home would be more populated

You said this rich old man you really hated

To which your parents had insisted you be mated

You wished for true love you had waited

This in no uncertain words you stated

When I asked if you’d elope with me you became very animated

And said yes you would if you got properly compensated

You also told me you had calculated

How much time you’d get if you used a knife that was serrated

Since the gun you had intended to use was confiscated

Thinking of the gun and knife I realized I could be perforated

And In my own blood become saturated

And I could wind up assassinated

or exterminated

And by a jury of men she would probably be exonerated

You said by a pre nup you were so manipulated

Which your husband had very carefully dictated

If you divorced him the will would be invalidated

And you’d be left with a little check for twenty five thousand three hundreds and forty five dollars which you couldn’t cash anywhere in New York or Boston or Chicago or Miami  until three weeks after the divorce became final  and that was all because the check would be postdated