The lifeguard © TonyFallon 062918.

The lifeguard © TonyFallon 062918.

I was sitting vigilant in my lifeguard's chair
Enjoying the scenery and the fresh sea air
When I heard the cry there's a swimmer in trouble
I went racing to the ocean on the double
On the beach there was a young girl sobbing
Out in the ocean there was one head bobbing
She said it was her younger sister
She tried to grab but had missed her
I blew my whistle for more assistance
And ran towards the head in the distance
I dived through the incoming wave
Praying to God I could make this save
When I broke the water I was well prepared 
She was ten feet away trashing and scared
She had a yellow inflated type of rubber vest
It might keep her afloat but I was not impressed
This was pure trouble if she didn't calm down
She could drag me under and we both would drown
While she trashed she would probably stay afloat
All would be well if the others launched the boat
I told her relax this is real you're not dreaming
You'll have to breathe deeply and please stop screaming 
I told her I could save her but only if she spoke
I asked her if she knew how to do the backstroke
She said she was eighteen and her name was Trish
Her legs were swollen she had been stung by jelly fish
I said we are going that way as I pointed to the shore
Now start doing the backstroke like you've done before
On shore hundreds were now causing a commotion
I said to Trish lets get out of here I'm tired of this ocean
I pushed and pulled and swam like never before
And a big incoming wave dumped us both on shore

Within a few days she was no worse for wear

And she and her sister often visit my high chair

Since that day my life has gone from dull to swell
I'm the talk of the beach and I'm known quite well
There is nothing like being in the right place and time

When I go into the bars now I don’t have to spend a dime

Every day there are beauties sunning in my piece of sand
And when pictures are being taken I'm in great demand.
The paper posted my picture above a fine big spread
And I've had a few proposals to settle down and wed.

A short romance © Tony Fallon 062718

A short romance © Tony Fallon 062718

She said she loved me as we sat 'neath the new moon
That was exactly the twentieth day of June
I thought this would be one great big summer romance
She was here for the summer from Paris in France
Last night she told she viewed this as a town for hicks
And she could not spend the summer out in the sticks.

Summer Love © Tony Fallon062618

Summer Love © Tony Fallon062618

I will climb the mountain I will swim the widest stream

You are my Summer Love the one who appeared in my dream

I was hoping you’d live in the valley and not on the mountain so far

For I have only a bicycle and I cannot even get the loan of a car 

In the Shadows © Tony Fallon 062518

In the Shadows © Tony Fallon 062518

I’m not finished with the shadow although I thought I was

When I get home at night instead of entering I often pause

In case there is anybody hiding in the shadows

I’ve pulled up all the weeds and cut back the shrubs

I’ve cut all the branches off the trees now they are only stubs

So if anybody tries to hide they will be exposed

They went in the window last week because the door was closed.

I’ve often heard the expression fight and flight

That’s exactly how I felt last week on Saturday night.

I somehow feel like I was personally assaulted

When I’m walking in my driveway I feel almost haunted

There are more lights outside now than in most parking lots

I have LED’s and sodium and many floodlights and spots

So my neighbors can see the crooks hiding in the night

Last week he unscrewed the bulb from the outdoor light.

Inside he unhooked the camera he was very well prepared

That he should know so much certainly has me scared

If I should meet that man again there won’t be much affection

And he better have some decent health insurance protection.

Help © Tony Fallon 062317

Help © Tony Fallon 062317

I woke up today and realized this is close to fraud
Will you make this mess clear to me in the name of God?
You said not to say I love you especially today
But if I said I liked you instead that would be okay
You said that you are confused and you can't pretend
You said you still loved me deeply but only as a friend
If I should agree that I think someone is confused
Should I want to go home alone will I be excused
I really am bewildered this I must confess
I think you'd love me more if I said I love you less

The World Cup © Tony Fallon061918

The World Cup © Tony Fallon061918


For the Russians to have the World Cup took a lot of balls
And having to worry about anti communist calls
By prejudiced referees and linesmen from the hated west
Or over obsessed officials demanding a daily blood test
Or accusations that the home team was fed a hormone
Especially the forward who was built like Fred Flinstone

Flying © Tony Fallon 062018

Flying © Tony Fallon 062018

I checked "I have nothing taxable to declare"
As I filled out the port of entry questionnaire
I was as sick as a dog from all the motion
Ten thousand feet above the Atlantic Ocean
This was my first my only and last airline trip
Next time like Big Tom used to do I'll take the ship
I don't like airplanes and I do not like their food
Whether the meals are boiled or baked or even stewed
I don't know where they keep the food or it is stored
Out of the oven everything tastes like cardboard
It was as bad going over as coming back
After arriving I got a bathroom attack
They said if I'd fly again I'd be in first class
To get me on again will require laughing gas
Then to top it they also lost two of my bags
Even though I had my surname on both the tags
Today they say my bags were found in Montreal
But I have no clean underwear in Donegal.
When I got back to Donegal I kissed the grass
If they think I'm going up again they can kiss something else

Grandma Knows (The Shadow) © Tony Fallon 062218

Grandma Knows © Tony Fallon 062218

 I don't think the sun ever shone in Ireland until I was four
Because I do not remember ever being outside the door
Then one fine day my mother angrily said "will you PLEASE go out?"
I did not proceed fast enough suddenly she began to shout
What is a little four year old to do in the big outside world?
I knew nothing then about football and I certainly hadn't hurled
As I sat beside a big cock of hay thinking my end was night
This big thing they said was the sun suddenly appeared in the sky
My mother hurried out of the house so happy she was dancing
And making the sign of the cross as at the sky she was glancing
This is the woman who before was threatening to kill or main
And now is all excited because in the sky there is a flame
When I started to move towards her I found myself in a bind
I could sense there was something very odd following close behind
I turned it was right there in front of me then something very weird
When I got to the cock of hay it just suddenly disappeared
I did not know if this dark phantom was a blessing or a plague
When I asked my mother to talk about it she was very vague
She said it was a shadow and I'd have it till the day I die
Except on dark rainy days when there would be no sun in the sky
That evening my mother said stay inside but I was defiant
I got a scare once I went out my shadow was now a giant
I didn't know if this was an angel or a devil sent specter
But Grandma said the answer was it was my Godly protector
It will do everything I do it was just an imitator
I wasn't worried any more it was just an impersonator

The Knockcroghery Chipper Van, © Tony Fallon New York

The Knockcroghery Chipper Van, © Tony Fallon New York

Some awful strange things happen in Ireland nearly every day
Politicians will never let common sense get in their way 
The Roscommon County Council has unveiled a master plan
They are going out to Knockcroghery to close the chipper van

Many a Lecarrow man was prepared to tell a pack of lies
But was quickly forgiven by his wife because he brought her fries
At two or three in the morning where else can a man get kipper
Only in Donoghues old yard in the van they call "The Chipper'

Heading to Rahara at the Knocroghery van I would halt
I soaked the fish and chips in vinegar but never used the salt
There's few places serving food so late and they have so many fans
There has never been any trouble like this since The Black and Tans

I'm sure in Roscommon there are more unappealing sites
And after nearly twenty years there they must have some rights
Over here we always have what's called a grandfather clause
You can't close a functioning business because you changed the laws

They say the business is illegal, illegal is a sick bird 
I think the councils thinking here is very, very blurred
By closing down this Fish and Chips who is going to gain
There's enough unemployed in Ireland don't add Emma-Jane
The Council should adopt the motto "don't fix unless it's broken"
And I'm sure the local residents will be very outspoken
I don't know if you could get such service in New York or Japan
People could soon go to bed hungry if they close the chipper van

THE chipper van has been in KNOCKCROGHERY

FOR ALMOST 20 YEARS usually open at night for bar patrons.

Now the COUNTY COUNCIL WANTS TO CLOSE IT.
There may be more verses later.

Meeting God © Tony Fallon 061318

Meeting God © Tony Fallon 061318

Sometimes people meet up with God without any warning
They have lost someone when they wake up in the morning
Suddenly they are praying to God amid guilt and sorrow
Praying the same think does not happen to them tomorrow


Other find God if they think their live is coming to a close
Slowly crashing from a high after sniffing coke in their nose
Now in a panic some hurried prayers to God they send
Because they fear their stupidness may foretell their coming end

Some suddenly find their lost God when they can sin no more
They suddenly believe there's a God like never before 
They also believe they are like the bibles prodigal son
And they will go to heaven when their race on earth is run

Some others turn to their God when unhealthy or distressed
When they have no bed to lay their head or they are depressed
They know God or his earthly angels will apply love and concern
And do their best to make sure in death they will not burn 

Some wake up in hospital in a complete body cast
The night before they were driving their car way too fast
Being chased by five cars of the city highway squad
Now they are so scared and devoutly praying to their God

A Met Fan © Tony Fallon 060918

A Met Fan © Tony Fallon 060918

I lost my girlfriend in Citi Park
Friday night just after dark
I sent her to the concession stand
With two ten dollar bills in her hand
My throat was dry from all the cheering
From the noise I had lost my hearing
I don’t know exactly what she said
It probably was “Go drop dead”
I didn’t realize how long she was gone
Until the Yanks led by three to one
I don’t know if she left in a gypsy van
Or fell for the charms of a Yankee fan
Last night was a night of distress
The Mets lost and I’m a girlfriend less.

The Park © Tony Fallon 060718

The Park © Tony Fallon 060718

I went into the Park this evening I thought I would be glad
But when I thought about you again suddenly I was sad
I repeated your name out loud as sad tears rolled down my face
As I retraced our steps once more in our very special place
I had stayed away for two long years to get over the loss
But memories came back as the meadow I started to cross
Your lovely smile the hearty laugh things I fondly remember
Reading poetry on that long ago day in September
Remember the time we took pictures of the swans in the pond
We were very like that couple of swans with our special bond
An owl was now somewhere in the trees constantly asking who?
I've been in there so often before I thought he surely knew
I sat there on our own wooden bench and sadly reminisced
And I prayed I'd see you happily walking out of the mist

A Mind© Tony Fallon 060718

A Mind© Tony Fallon 060718

It’s hard to change another person’s mind

If the store is not that way inclined

I told them this mind was never used

Once more they politely refused

The next store asked for a receipt

Very quickly I was out on the street

At the next I told them it was not abused

One guy behind the counter was very amused

The manager said he had only a half

Maybe they could buy it on his behalf

I said it needed changing it wasn’t for sale

This mind had once been a star at Yale

I asked if they specialized in modification

Could they just exchange some information?

Maybe like a computer it could get updates

After all this is the United States

I said it had been badly manipulated

And desperately needed to be updated

It hates all the liberals and Democrats

People from Mexico and Diplomats

It thinks everyone deserves an AK forty seven

And prays for people shot at seven eleven

It thinks North Korea will act much better

Because it send us a mocking big letter

It doesn’t think the Russian screwed the election

And for the Justice Department has no affection

Maybe you could give it an injection of reality

Then it could get back its old personality

Viewing © Tony Fallon 060618

Viewing © Tony Fallon 060618

Everybody likes a particular face

Belonging to a person they would like to embrace

It could be the color of the eyes

The shape of the lips or their size

Some pretty faces are oval others round

And after a hot summer many are browned

The faces most important part is the chin

I love it when I see one resting on a violin

I like a rounded forehead with no showing veins

That is the kind that has a lot of brains

The hair and the ears are important too

I do not like it if the ears are pushing through

I prefer a face that has two sparkling blue eyes

That could make a man happy under darkening skies

And a smile that says your lonely days are spent

Just love me forever and I’ll make you content

Dreamer© TonyFallon060618

Dreamer© TonyFallon060618

I fell in love with a dreamer

And I cannot redeem her

Her I do not want to change

Even though she acts strange

By change I don’t mean another

Because she is the perfect mother

But for hours she won’t move

When she’s in a dreamy groove

She dreams we are millionaires

And puts on all kind of airs

Wants to know “where is the maid?”

Then goes into a wild tirade

Won’t even sit down and chat

Won’t feed the children or the cat

She won’t answer the door or the phone

When she’s in this dreamy zone

Doctors say it’s a harmless habit

A make believe land she can inhabit

I often wonder if it’s a dream or a spell

Or if the future she can foretell

If that is the case all could be right

If she picks the number for Saturday night.

The other Hands © Tony Fallon060518

The other Hands © Tony Fallon060518

While on a walk I met a girl the other night
On a lonely mountain dirt road all dressed in white
She asked softly if she could be my companion
Until we had passed by the upcoming canyon
She said she considered this lone place unholy
And she never ever walked by there just slowly
She commented on the cold weather for mid June
And how the dark clouds were still covering the moon
She said it felt like a long ago Halloween
She had first walked this road when she was just eighteen
She said she was scared would I hold onto her hand
It was not a question but more of a command
The area was suddenly covered with fog
And from the other side appeared a snarling dog
It felt like many snakes were crawling down my spine
Somehow I did not have the boldness to decline
Was I being led directly to my demise?
Nobody would ever hear my desperate cries
She held out her hand and it felt as cold as clay
I suddenly saw the face it was old and grey
For the clouds had parted allowing some moonlight
I realized there could be no wild thought of flight
With no nose, eyes or ears this thing looked hideous
I surmised her plan for me was insidious
Suddenly a truck was coming in slow progress
When I looked there was a dog collar and a dress
The driver asked if I knew of some local lore
Of the terrible things that happened here before
That every ten years in June a she ghost appears
Kills a man and takes away his heart,hands and ears.

The Hands © Tony Fallon 060418

The Hands © Tony Fallon 060418

There were many things to which a woman could turn her hand
If she was born in Ireland and a woman of the land
The hand that rocks the cradle can smack you on the wrist
Or rearrange your teeth or face with an angry fist
The hand that did the cooking and made the sweetest pie
Could be used to punish if you told the smallest lie
Those hands could also put together good thick Irish stew
I think it had more nourishment than a barbecue
The hand that killed the chicken could also toss your hair
And when you cut your knee or elbow wipe away the tear
The hand that fed the turkeys also daily milked the cow
And my mother told me she helped her father with the plow
My father was a builder who used his hands to plaster tanks
And assemble scaffoldings for roofs with uprights and planks
I remember my mother's writing there were few better
I know it was her brain talking but the hand wrote the letter
I remember her written letters coming over the foam
Asking me after twenty five years when I was coming home.
We often exchanged letters her writing was like no others
Among five hundred ones I could still pick out my mothers
The hands were very handy to have, whether right or left
We are ambidextrous so with both we were very fast and deft
So when I see this week's subject I admit I don't understand
What exactly you mean when you say write about the other hand *

Until © Tony Fallon 060318

Until © Tony Fallon  060318

I thought you’d know I love you by all I do

But you are not happy unless I say”I Love You”

You never say it to me unless I say it first

So why are you complaining I am not the worst

When I say I love you, you always say “Me Too”

Is that you loving me or is that you loving you?

This blatant ambiguity is leaving me confused

And I’ll have to tell you my ego is often bruised

I didn’t think much about this love until the shake up

But I sure did enjoy those two nights of makeup

Was your mother not the loving kind but cold?

When you were hurting were you not consoled?

Or did your dad call you a princess and you believed

I do not like to guess or to have to preconceive

Maybe I’m not the type of man you require

Maybe you need a man who is a ball of fire

I love you as you are and I’m willing to endure

Until you believe I love you and are happy and secure

Not Forgotten© Tony Fallon 060118

Not Forgotten© Tony Fallon 060118

For ten days you've been gone yet your stuff is everywhere
I won't say what I found this morning underneath the chair
The first few text messages I sent you completely ignored

I know you are alive because it was changed to won’t record

I can’t get in touch with your parents you never left me their phone

And nobody with your surname ever heard of you in Bayonne

With all your stuff here I can't invite any other girl to my pad
I cannot invite my mother either and I cannot invite my dad
There are prescription in the cabinet some undies on the floor
And so much clothes in the closet I cannot open the door
There are hair pins and curlers hair dryers pony tails and wigs
And the bathroom wouldn't be dirtier if I invited in the pigs
I gathered up the high heels and pumps and a whole lot of pantyhose

I tried to put them all into a suitcase but I could not get it to close

The washing machine is filled with dirty clothes right to the rim
I have no place to put my sweaty clothes coming in from the gym
I have no idea where you put the extra sheets and pillow cases

And yesterday when I moved my toothbrush there were your braces

There are clothes in boxes in the attic in plastic bags under the bed

I’m afraid to look in the Garage I’m also afraid to look in the shed

You have enough cosmetics for all the waves in one battleship

And I didn’t know Chanel made so many shades of lipstick

You took all of your pens and pencils but you didn't take your pads
They were beside the coffee table when I invited in some lads
It's been a long time since I suffered so much abusive teasin'
I was asked to explain at work if I had those pads for a reason
To get rid of the aggravation I joked I had a problem with piles
Now two guys I want nothing to do with are giving me big smiles

There’s a big old IBM computer here when I plugged in it misfired

It says its Windows seven and the maintenance has long ago expired

Your car is still sitting in the driveway you didn't leave me the keys
The windows and top are covered with shit from birds in the trees

I don’t know how I’m to get rid of all this or if you are in jail

I don’t know whether to order a dumpster or have a garage sale