Late night Shopping © Tony
Fallon 013018
Three nights ago I was
shopping at Walmart
The woman behind let go an
awful fart
I wouldn’t be surprised if
she messed her jeans
Probably for dinner she ate a
lot of beans
The teenager with her was red
as a rose
As she walked away she was
holding her nose
Most of those behind were in
reverse
Some of the comments were
downright perverse
One little old man said
that’s some fart
I’m surprised it didn’t melt
the paint on the cart
She gave this poor man a look
that could kill
And her shopping cart she
started to un fill
I still had to pay I was soon
almost alone
The cashier the customer and
I in a smelly zone
I pitied the poor cashier the
most
She’d be fired if she left
her post
She did get on the intercom
with an earnest plea
“There appears to be a spill
at register three”
The maintenance man came over
and he gasped
“What the hell happened
here?”he rasped
Oh mon Dieui”he said “pardon
my French
Gallons of Jaye’s Fluid
couldn’t kill this stench
There is something rotten other
than in Denmark
For God’s sake don’t light a
cigarette or cause a spark”
So I turned on my heel and
left everything on the belt
When I got outside you can’t
believe how good I felt
To find out what had happened
I called back later
Now every maintenance man
gets a free respirator
The worse case scenario there
is the possibility
That this poor man will be
charged with hostility.
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